His name is Robert Paulson!

Oh yeah, you want to high-five me right now. I don't owe Discover Card a damn dime as of yesterday, and I didn't even have to go all Fight Club on the credit reporting bureaus to do it. I am two-fifths of the way to the Shangri La of no credit card debt, where no one gets hassled by The Man. Yeah, I know I did this to myself, but screw The Man anyway. Fuck you Amex Travel and Leisure and your little dog Discover too! And as for you, MBNA, Chase and Providian, you're all gonna be my bitches soon. I'm not waiting for death to give me a name, you dirty whores. And you can take that to the bank.